Some unexpected lessons
- Dont plan for something completely out of your control
- Take a leap of faith
- Exercise helps
- Cherish time with your children
- Dont keep toxic people in your life
Dont Plan for something completely out of your control.
Well, lets just get right into it and say I planned to be pregnant by now. I never even considered that we would still be trying for a baby in January. After the miscarriage, I was devastated that we would be setback a couple of months. Now Im going on 5 months since we got pregnant in August. I just keep seeing the gap between a new baby and Dakota growing everyday. I just have to listen to everyone telling me 3 years apart will be great!
Moral of the story, be flexible and know that our timing isn’t always the right timing.
Take a leap of faith.
Yes, people WILL judge you! Yes, it will be scary. You can do it though, I promise. Jon and I have both built businesses based (that’s a lot of B’s) on a leap of faith and a lot of planning.
This summer Jon had a crazy idea to build a mini ramp for skateboarding in our garage. He built a side hustle/business teaching kids how to skateboard. It is something that he loves and he’s really great with kids. Check out The Active Grind if you want! If you’re local to Thompsons Station/Franklin area he teaches at the local skateparks and in our garage!
I moved my salon suite to a brand new shared room in October with my friend Aimee. It has been a financial blessing for both of us. It was a little scary to make that change but is turning out to be great. Not every leap of faith will work out, but trying is the brave part. You cant succeed if you never try it out!
Exercise helps.
It really does! I did the most working out of my whole life this year. I felt amazing mentally and physically. It truly helped me in all areas of life! I loved going to classes because of the accountability.
Admittedly I quit when I had the miscarriage. In my head I wondered if I could have worked out too hard? I know that wasn’t it, but mentally I just felt like I couldn’t drag myself back. I am now, with the rest of the world, making it a New Years resolution to get back to the gym! I can do this, you can do this too!
Cherish time with your children.
It feels like time passes faster than ever! I just can’t believe the holidays are over and its January of 2019. How am I 32 now? I really don’t feel like I am, so I’ll say that’s what really counts!
Our everyday routines can make time fly by so I try to be intentional about spending time with Dakota, playing with her. I also stare at her a lot. haha! I just want to take it all in. I have a horrible memory so I really fear losing these memories of her as a baby and toddler. That breaks my heart to think about! I take so many videos so that I cant forget. Thank God Jon has a GREAT memory. I just plan on asking him to recap moments of our lives when Im old. Like in the Notebook, but hopefully I don’t develop Alzheimers like she did.
Dont keep toxic people in your life.
There are just some people who have the ability to beat us down with how they treat us. Have you experienced these people? I have had clients that I dread so much that I would feel down and anxious if I saw their name on my books. It’s not that they would not like their hair, its that they would be so unhappy with themselves that it was being taken out on me.
The other type of toxic person is the one who doesn’t respect you. Maybe they don’t respect your time, your beliefs, your newest venture or your opinion. I have had to weed out some clients who brought me that sinking feeling every time they came in. It does help! Its not always possible to totally detox your life but at least make steps to.
What have you learned in 2018? I believe life is always teaching us lessons and we’re all continuing to grow from them. Please let me know in the comments or on my instagram if you can relate!
xo,
Jessica
Thank you for sharing your feelings with those that follow you! Your story is very touching. I myself would definitely entertain the possibility of another child but in my case it’s not a possibility. I am a single mom of an amazing 6 year old boy. I acknowledge that some people cannot have any children (dear friends of mine) so i am totally aware that having my son is an utter blessing and miracle. I was engaged to his dad and was known as mommy to his two children from his previous marriage. He was unfaithful 3 years ago and I was left to manage for myself and our son together. And I’d do it all again just to have my son full time. But being that I’m 46 and single, I do not have an opportunity to have another child. So I guess what I’m saying is, you are young and do have time. Even if your second child comes and there is a 4 or 5 year gap between the two, it won’t make a difference. It will still be perfect, as everything ends up in God’s timing. It’s easy to get frustrated. I wish my son had a daily playmate, I wish he had a step dad to look up to, I wish I had a partner to count on. But when I get discouraged i remember that God knows in strong and I was given the most amazing little boy to do life with. So for now, we pray, wait and trust. Best wishes to you and your beautiful family. Your daughter is just the cutest (I love her little sweet voice!!) I hope you get your wish sooner than you expect. 🙂
Thank you for sharing this Lori. I’m so sorry that your ex was unfaithful, that breaks my heart for you. I’m sure your son is just happy to have a mom who can give him all of her attention and love. I was an only child until I was 7 and got a step brother. Gods timing can be so hard to wait for. You are right though about everything you said! Thank you so much❤️ Saying a prayer for you
Abc thank you for your thoughtful reply! It means a lot. It’s def hard to wait on His timing. I always pray and sometimes I say Ok God, let’s speed things up a bit ok? Haha. I hope He gets my humor 😜.
And btw I hate in my original comment that I said “you are young and you have time”. I hope it didn’t come off sounding cliche. While that may be true, I understand there’s always complications and unfortunate situations, such as the miscarriage you endured. But I did mean it sincerely as in let it happen as it should because there is time. My dear friend had a little boy two years ago and horribly, he died about 10 hours after birth. She was completely destroyed, as any of us would be. She struggled to get the energy to try again while grieving such a horrible loss. She became pregnant again and miscarried shortly after. Then she became pregnant again. That pregnancy was healthy! Just 3 weeks ago she gave birth to a healthy baby girl. So there is always hope!!. Big hugs to you 🥰
Wow!! Now that’s one strong mama! No I took absolutely no offense to that. It’s actually comforting because I have been feeling a little nervous about getting older. Plenty of women have babies in their mid to late 30s though 💜 thank you!!
Ok good 🙂
And yes! I was 40 when I had my son. And that girlfriend i mentioned is 40 as well. She is a strong woman, it’s anazing. We all are though. Kids give us super powers.
Great blog on 2018 Jess! Living with things out of our control is stressful but I’ve learned to roll with it and toss the fireball back up to God. Good things will happen for you.
I know that you of all people have the best advice on this!! Thank you Ann 💜
Love everything about this!!! Happy New Year – hope it’s one of you’re best ones yet! xoxo
Thank you girl!! Happy new year to you 😘🥳 I hope it’s a great year for you too!